Sunday, February 06, 2005

Predator 2

Until tonight, I'd never actually seen Predator 2. I'd heard some good things, though, so I was kind of looking forward to it.

I did not see any good things.

It was like they had a brainstorm meeting to come up with the story...

"We should think Aliens. In fact, let's take the Vasquez and Hicks characters outright. Let's even call on those actors... We can surely get at least one of them. It doesn't matter, though, if we can't we can always use Maria Conchita Alonso or that dumb guy from Ruthless People. Nobody'll notice the difference."

"But there's always Robocop, that was a huge hit."

"Yes! But what if it was less clear about being in the future. Some people like that future stuff, some find it off-putting. Try to make everybody happy on this one."

"And the gangs were more outlandish, like, say, The Warriors."

"Great. Now, we just need a lead. I say we go with the good ol' renegade cop who can't abide by authority."

"No, I think he should be an authority figure with a renegade underling who can't abide by him."

"C'mon, guys, those are both great. Let's make him a renegade Lieutenant who can't answer to his chief, but has a renegade detective who can't abide by him."

"Rock on, dudes!"

"That reminds me... If there's any way we can get the Predator to say some cheesy action movie lines, too, that'd make it all perfect."

"Consider it done."

No comments:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Google Analytics