Friday, December 08, 2006

What do women see when they see a breast?

I was innocently skimming Comic Book PSA: When editing for the trade is a good idea, when I followed to link to Censored Essentials? regarding censorship in the new Marvel Essential volumes of their classic Tomb of Dracula series.

Anyway, I come to the end and there's a link to Eyeful of breast-feeding mom sparks outrage, which is the most horrifying story of idiocy I've read in some time, at least that didn't involve the White House.

Let me emphasize here, Gayle Ash of Belton, Texas and Kelly Wheatley of Amarillo, Texas are two of the dumbest lifeforms to ever draw breath.

"A breast is a breast — it's a sexual thing..."

Uh, not exactly, dumbass. It's actually for feeding babies.

Now, it can (and goddamn well should) be used as part of sexual arousal and foreplay and such, but that doesn't alter their purpose. Much like earlobes and anuses.

How do you draw the brain power to breathe?

"I don't want my son or husband to accidentally see a breast they didn't want to see."

Or do you not want them to see a breast that you don't want them to see?

Look, grow up, lady!

Of course, that's nothing compared to "When [men] see a woman's breast, they see a breast."

This is definitely, to the best of my understanding, accurate.

And while I do have a vague idea what she's trying to say, I'm still... I have to say... Uh... Wha--?

When, oh, when will people like this be wiped off the planet?

These people are the enemy of everything I believe in - not Mrs. Wheatley, who means well, despite her raging idiocy - the very least of which is my belief in magazines with boobs on their covers.

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