Friday, April 17, 2009

Savage stuff


Hot Roommate Cam by Dan Savage, begins with this letter, "My roommate is astoundingly hot... I'm considering spying on her with a hidden surveillance cam... Is this normal? Thanks In Advance."

Is having a voyeuristic fantasy normal? Yes. Astoundingly so.

But really. Who sits around wondering if their fantasies are "normal"? Boring people. People whose fantasies are not only "normal" but even banal.

Is acting on said voyeuristic fantasy and violating your the privacy of others normal? Crap, I sure hope not.

Toilet Sex by Dan Savage leads one to this delight, Young girls walk in on four people having sex in restaurant bathroom by Alana Greenfogel.

"'They saw two women servicing two men in the restroom,' Robert Schumann, the girls' father, says. 'Eleven years old is still not old enough to learn about such things as that.'"

This leads to the question, what is old enough?

"'My 11-year-old asked me, "How come two women were coming out of the bathroom and why were two guys in there?" Melissa Schumann, the girls’ mother, says. '"And they were making funny noises."'"

How much detail did you have to go into?

No. It's a real question.

Mind you, I'm of a mind to agree with "Cracker Jack", who commented, "It's like a toddler falling down -- make a big deal and it is a big deal. Get all freaked out and tell the girl that she's witnessed a horrible thing and that she's tainted and she'll believe you."

But then I also see, "South Bend police say public sex happens very often and in many places. They say they’ve gotten calls from this Taco Bell before, as well as other fast food restaurants, bars, cars, parks and almost any public place."

If the girl's going to be living in South Bend, it seems like she may need to understand Taco Bell sex sooner rather than later, doesn't it?

"Taco Bell Spokesperson, Rob Poetsch, sent a statement that reads: 'The safety of our customers is our number one priority, and although this is an isolated incident, we’re having self-locking doors installed as a precautionary measure.'"

See? Now, everyone can get off in the South Bend Taco Bell without being disturbed by errant children. Including little eleven year old Ms. Schumann, once she's "old enough" to know about "such things as that."

Whenever exactly that's supposed to be...


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